Here we go!

Well, it is really late but I know some of you are curious about our meeting today so I will write about it. It was a three hour meeting so obviously I can't repeat everything right now.

First of all we really liked the agency director and the attorney. They made us feel very comfortable about the whole process. We met with each of them and they told us about the process, some of the kentucky laws, and the types of birth mothers they work with.

For now I'm just going to list some facts as they come to me:

- Something we did not know - we will have to hire our own attorney. The agency does not provide one for us. The attorney we met with today is the one that works with the birth parents. So that is another expense we were not including in our estimations.
- They primarily work with birthmothers who are ages 25-38. Most of these birthmothers already have children and they don't think they can care for another child, or the mother is married and the child is not her husband's and other scenarios like that.
- Once we fill out our packet of paperwork - which includes the forms for background checks, an official application that is very detailed, a questionnaire about how we were raised, how we plan to raise our children, how we feel about our marriage, how getting a child will effect our marriage, etc., reference letters, credit references, copies of marriage license, birth certificates, tax returns, budget/income information, etc., etc., etc. - then we will have orientation.
- She thinks the next orientation will be at the end of October or early November - there is actually one next week but there is no way to get all the paperwork in by then.
- Oh and we have to get a medical check which includes a chest x-ray - I doubt Daniel's current insurance will pay for a chest x-ray - I hope mine will! Hopefully UPS insurance will kick in before he has to get his chest x-ray done.
- At orientation we will get three forms - one for our attorney to sign, one that has a questionnaire of what type of child we are willing to adopt and we rate each category as - definitely would adopt to not on my life (she worded it that way but said it was much more professional sounding on the form) and then I forgot the third form but maybe Daniel remembers.
- The orientation will include about 6 other couples. Whoever gets their form signed by the attorney first and faxed in to the office will get first pick of the date of the homestudy.
- She thought she would probably do our homestudy in November or December.
- Once the homestudy is completed they will begin showing our profile to birthmoms.
- Our profiles is basically a scrapbook of our lives. You all know I love to make scrapbooks! So that will be fun for me but we have to get 5 copies of it made, laminated and bound, so again there is another expense. But that is okay, it is worth it.
- Since we are willing to adopt pretty much any race - we will probably have a match by early spring. The birthmother could be 3 months pregnant or 9 months pregnant when we are matched - it really just depends
- We will probably meet her and she will probably have our cell phone number (they suggest cell phone because you can easily change that number after the adoption). We will be at the hospital when the baby is born. We will stay there for 48 hours but no family members or friends are allowed to come visit. Then after 48 hours we bring the baby home.
- We are considered foster parents until the court date. They try to get the court date within 2-4 weeks. It just depends on which county the baby is born in. If it is small county with a judge that only is there once a month that becomes a little more difficult. They said since we live in Louisville they will try to get the birthmother to come here for court because louisville is fast.
- She said they have a less than 1 in 5 rate of birthmothers changing their minds. If they do it is usually at the hospital before you take the baby home. And we will probably lose any fees we paid for the birthmothers costs. But we will not lose the adoption fee because we don't pay it until placement.

Well, for now that is about all I can remember to say. Please ask questions and it will remind me. I will post more specifics soon about what they will look for in a homestudy, what they suggest we include in our profile, and whatever else I forgot to mention.

Sorry this turned out to be so long!