Someone gave me an article written by a mother of a disabled child. But as I was reading it I was thinking you can pretty much apply this to anything in your life that you planned and it didn't go quite how you planned. For instance in our case we planned on having biological children and things haven't gone as we planned but now there is a new plan and it is a good plan. Read the below analogy I think it is really neat.
"When you're going to have a baby, its like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italiain. It's all very exciting."
"After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, 'welcome to Holland'"
"HOLLAND?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?" I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
"But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay"
"The important thing is they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It's just a different place."
"So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. and you will meet a whole new group of people you would have never met"
"It's just a different place. It's slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there awhile and you catch your breath, you look around, and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts."
"But everyone around you is busy coming and going from Italy, and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
"And the pain of that will never, ever go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss"
"But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't go to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland."
Written by Emily Perl Kingsley
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5 comments:
This is a wonderful article. I love you! MOM L
Wow!
(I'm going to send that to my mom and she is going to cry!)
Love,
Haley
speaking as an ENFP, change and variety are wonderful things! not only should you go to Holland, but Brazil, China, Russia, Uganda, India and anywhere else that sounds interesting. We're looking forward to having all of the continents (except maybe antartica) as part of the family. (I know that's not the real point of the article, but it's a nice side light to it.)
I think ESPNs (or ESFPs however you want to look at it) like to have a variety too! And Adventure! And Fun! This will be a great adventure! And luckily I'm not married to a TJ. (People reading this are going to think we are crazy, Dad, all of these letters and all EISNTFPJ).
No offense to any TJs reading this - they are great too they just would rather be a little more stable and less adventuresome - I think!
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